Thursday, July 23, 2009

Amy - You're Beautiful!

Dear Amy,
I was so proud of you for being brave enough to come alone to Joey and Mariah's wedding Saturday.   I know it was hard for you ... but you still are our family, and it was good to be there with us.
It's been a while since I've updated here,  and I know this blog never got off of the ground.  You had great intentions, but I also know that a few months ago you were reeling with emotions.  You still are, and your life now revolves around trying to be a Mother, a Daughter, a Sister, a Friend and Chemo.
You look good.  Beautiful, Peaceful, and  no longer haunted by your future.  As hard as it is ... and it is, you are doing well today.  I'm so happy for you that you're fairly tolerating the Chemo, and I hate it for you that you have so much more of it left to go and the uncertainty of your every days. 
If only we could go back and change the past .... if only we could see and know what our tomorrows bring, so much would have changed, and maybe you wouldn't be going through this.  I guess I'm still not past the what if's.  I'm not in your place, but I will always be here for you.
Mainly,  even through this hard time ... you've found something so far bigger than anything you've ever known.  You've found love.  True deep love.  Not that you never had it before ... but right now in your life, it is greater and better than ever.  It's the love for your boys.
I love you Amy.